Truck Stories

trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
Seems that dave40 be gone for sure. Be missin
them tells he be postin now. That dave40 sure new
alot bout them trucks, thats for sure! Good luck on
this one now!
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Comments

  • obyoneobyone Member Posts: 7,841
    since his last post when his dog died...either here or at the Pacific Audio site.
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    topic when it started out..."where be"

    LOL

    - Tim
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    He knew them trucks bout as good as Franklin now, and that Franklin knows them trucks now! Good luck on this one now!
  • RoclesRocles Member Posts: 982
    Oh yeah...he knew so much....What was he again? Oh yeah...A poor GMC owner...

    Trucksrme--There is only way and it's a FORD WAY.

    Roc
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    Did you ever notice we never saw his pics of his "supposedly 2500"...before he modified it?

    He had after market wheels...took the badges off...so there really was no way to tell he had a 2500?>.....he always praised the 6.0...but did he really have one??

    Then he posted a few pictures of a 1500...(black too)..that he bought after..

    when asked what happened to the 2500?...he never did respond..

    hmmmmmmm

    - Tim
  • andy_jordanandy_jordan Member Posts: 764
    Is that site still up - anyone have the link - I can't be bothered to search it out?
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    That truckforce had them fine trucks for sure. Good luck on this one now!
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    and tranferring it over to my server....and kinda re-vamp it...and continue?

    Webtv had limits for Dave....it needed the trucks to be thumbnail pictures....so it would load faster for people with dial ups.

    Cable/DSL/ISDN people were fine.......but it was slow for 33.6/56K

    I got a cable modem Saturday.....man this is nice...

    - Tim
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    That truckforce be needin too contiune on now. Good luck on this one now!
  • quadrunner500quadrunner500 Member Posts: 2,721
    Links to USTF and TruckForceAction appear to be dead. :(
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    if you are out there.....drop a line man...

    maybe I can get them pictures?....or just start fresh?

    - Tim
  • steveeaststeveeast Member Posts: 158
    was his email address according to his profile.
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    different pages...

    this was one of them

    http://community-2.webtv.net/truckforce/USTF/

    - Tim
  • ryanbabryanbab Member Posts: 7,240
    Was abducted by UFO's.
  • andy_jordanandy_jordan Member Posts: 764
    Dave40 and unix god disappeared hand in hand into the sunset :-)
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    he has moved onto other things.....what that means?....I dunno

    - Tim
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    Send your new pic's to

    [email protected]
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    Need too collect them truck stories again now. Them stories was the best ones yet! Start ya another topic on em. Good luck on this one now!
  • quadrunner500quadrunner500 Member Posts: 2,721
    Hi Dave,
    We've decided to deny your request to move on to other things. Your stuck with us!
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    so what about it dave??!

    what happend to the 2500...and how's the 1500?

    LOL

    - Tim
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    Maui, Hawaii - June, 2000 -- Supreme Truck Force Commander Dave 40, comes to the U.S. Truck Force Membership with great apologies for being out of contact for such a length period. Once knowing the whereabouts of your Chief in the Beautiful Black Truck and the goings on surrounding the past few months, you'll
    certainly be kind and generous in your forgiveness for such a lengthy delay between Road Reports.
                    This most recent adventure,(read "debacle"), began with a long planned trip to hear the Mormon Tabernacle Choir in Salt Lake and have a gander at that Organ! It was well worth the stop. The Spiritual Singing and that tremendous
    instrument would lift any unbeliever as well as any that had a connection with The Man Upstairs. Well, it blew me away. Kind of put me in an altered state
    for a few days... a kind of mind set where you do things without giving them quite enough logical thought first.
                    My serious unthinking actions started at a fast food spot some distance South of Salt Lake. My Truck, as most of you know, draws a crowd wherever it's parked and sitting in the lot at this hash house was no different. I finished-up my chow and after a rest stop headed for the parking lot where several admirers were gawking in, around, and under the Big GMC Sierra 2500 that makes a sweeter noise than Maynard Ferguson on his trumpet! One of the fellows asked if he could see the engine compartment. I, of course, replied in the affirmative - always wanting to do anything to boost interest in pick-em ups no matter what I'm doing. The fellow was blinded by the chrome and sano condition of the big box and asked numerous questions about intake and exhaust valves, carburetion and my high-trick, Dual Flow Master,full-flow exhaust system with the concert tone like no other.
                    This Gent was much impressed in general and wanted to know how much I had invested in the rig. I told him as near as I could recall and he flat-out
    said, "by damn I'ma gonna get me one of them". He then said he'd need a bigger cab, like a four door, because of transporting all his wives. I said, "what!". He then explained that he was what you call a polygamist. That's a man with more than one and sometimes several wives. Well, he sure had my attention by that time. I asked, "How many do you have?" After swearing me to secrecy, he told me, "six". Said they were, "All wonderful women who loved him dearly and
    were never jealous of each other." I couldn't believe it so he invited me to follow him to his home hidden in a small canyon-like setting some 20 miles away,
                    On arrival at his very rustic but highly livable digs, he introduced himself as Opra Ding and introduced me to two of his buds who were there at the time. They were brothers, also polygamists named Coot and Harold Simms. Each of them had five wives and loved every one of them. After meeting the happy wives, I became convinced that these folks had something going for themselves and they were all enjoying it. During subsequent conversations, I evidenced an interest in this polygamy thing and wondered how I could get involved. When the three men heard that, they were nearly jumping with joy. Seems that between them they had four daughters all between 18 and 22 years of age who'd never been married or with any man in a serious way and they thought I'd make a wonderful husband for all four of them. I said, "whoa, that's a bit many to start out with isn't it?"
                    I was assured it was a good round number and they'd all be happy staying together because they were raised together. Next thing I know, in marches Lulu,
    Harriett, and Charlene Simms and Flossa Ding. They all looked quite a lot alike. All were very pretty and well proportioned as Truck Force Folks might
    like. They talked about themselves and how much they wanted a Man to marry. They even started feeling my arms and legs and slipped a little touch here and there. Well, it wasn't long before a deal was struck. There'd be a mass wedding ceremony the next day and I'd have four wives. The Fathers were Gentlemen to the end and offered a fully paid month-long honeymoon for the five of us in Maui, Hawaii where they knew a realtor who'd find us the perfect hideaway on the beach were we could get to know our new mates.
                    We flew out of Salt Lake for LA and on to Hawaii in a faultless bit of scheduling. At the Honolulu Airport we were met by the Realtor Friend who
    had chartered a six passenger plane for a private flight to Maui. All the secrecy surrounding the whole operation intrigued me but I was too Wife-Happy to bust any bubbles by asking silly questions. Very shortly we had rented a nearly
    new Club Cab Chevy pick-up, taking a cue from Father Ding, and were following the Realtor to our Shangri-La on the Blue Pacific Ocean.
                    Once settled-in and lunch over we were dressed in bathing suits that each Wife had put on for me in an almost ceremonial fashion. Very pleasant. I
    suggested that on our first night they draw straws to see which would be sleeping in my bed. That didn't go over very well at all. Their plan, which we
    would follow was to draw straws as to who would be first to make hay with me. And, I wouldn't be finished 'til Flossa, Lulu, Harriett and Charlene were fully knowledgeable in the art of love making in all its varieties. The next day after a visit to the local Doctor for some cream to soothe my angry skin, I made
    a call to a Truck Force Pal in Salt Lake. "Commander Dave, where the hell are you?" he asked. I told him Maui with some new friends and I planned to spend the month. He then related to me a tale that had all the hair standing up on my neck. Seems that this polygamy stuff is against Federal Law and the word was out that some guy had married four young women a few days back and that they might be in Hawaii on a four-on-one Honeymoon! I said, "No way Dude, are you sure about this?" He said, "Hey Big Dave, cut me a break, I just read it in today's paper." "So, keep your eyes open for some character with his eyes bulging out and four Ladies on his arms." "You can tell him that the Feds really want to talk with him big time."
                    I was shaking when I got off the phone. I knew something had to be wrong with this set-up but NOT a Federal Offense! I was a wee bit scared out of my wits and away from my eight new [non-permissible content removed]. Too much for one head. I was fast
    moving to overload when I made the decision to end this illegal multi-legged love affair and get my back side out of trouble as fast as possible.
                    I confronted my "Wives" straight out. I told them that the Federal Law was looking for us in Hawaii and it wouldn't take a genius to know that Maui would be first choice for a month-long fivesome. I was firm. They'd have to fly back to Salt lake two at a time on different airlines and I'd meet them back
    at the Ding hideaway. There was no alternative. I wasn't getting a federal criminal record for four lovely women or anything else. I hadn't really known that this was seriously illegal when it started, but now its in the Salt Lake
    newspaper. Somehow or other, word of our wedding had leaked out and now we had to get out. Fast! I made arrangements for Mr. Ding and the Coots brothers to get a fair refund on the place for the time not used and I hobbled off to a non-descript hotel to hide-out until I knew the Wives were safely home. I was
    still more sore than I'd been since my first Service leave and walking was real agony. Through the pain I made it to the airport and the States. I picked-up
    my big 2500 and dashed out to Dings where everyone involved was waiting. They had heard the Law was after us and under the circumstances, they would simply annul the marriages and return the Wives to single women in just a few words.
    There were many tears shed, but all agreed it was the best thing to do. Charlene, Lulu, Flossa and Harriett all told me that our night together was pure magic and they hoped that fate would bring them another Dave-40. I told them that, "they were still all good as new and could pass for never being touched by
    any man and I vowed an oath of secrecy never to let anyone know what happened and who I was really with." To that end, I've had to change some names in this
    tale of tail -- but the facts are just as reported. As you all know the Supreme United States Truck Force Commander, Dave-40, never lies!! Let me know what you think of polygamy. I can tell you -- the first night's Hell!! All My Best to All of you. Many Blessings, Dave-40

    Send Your New Truck Pic's to
    [email protected]

    http://community.webtv.net/truckforce/USTF
  • RoclesRocles Member Posts: 982
    He's back...
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    What happend too the "truck stories" topic now! That was a good one for sure. Keep on postin them stories now, they be the best ones yet! Reckin meredith not be likin em now. Good luck on this one now!
  • quark99quark99 Member Posts: 136
    Trme-
    A country boy like yerself should be able to spell the word "reckon"....I reckon....did the mask slip a little, just for a second?
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    Ya be spellin in like them yuppies be spellin it now. Good luck on this one now!
  • quark99quark99 Member Posts: 136
    Quark is:
    Young-NOT
    Urban-NOT
    Professional-NOT
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    Just sayin ya got the spellin of them yuppies, wasnt sayin ya was one. Good luck on this one now!
  • quark99quark99 Member Posts: 136
    You're right...ya did say that. Quark is a "quality engineer"...but that just means I'm an old sheetmetal guy that learned some 'puter skills. Ya might say I am a "tin-knocker"...
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    Lets here another one of them tells now. Good luck on this one now!
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    99 Chevy LT 3/4 ton:
    Stockland tonneau cover
    Bedrug bed liner
    265/75r/16
    Prowler Wheels 16X8
    Smittybuilt nerf bars
    Directed 5 channel 800 watt amp
    10" fosgate woofer
    Things to come:
    Still saving for that Whipple
    6" lift
    Dual exhaust
    The pictures I sent were taken in my backyard in Tucson. Developers love to get ahold of land like this and stick houses and golf courses all over them.
    Thanks Dave
    Ed Page
    http://community.webtv.net/truckforce/USTF
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    TRUCK FORCE CHIEF NOW "DEAD MULE JAKEY" -- HOW
    MANY STRANGE WAYS HAVE YOU PUT YOUR TRUCK TO USE?
    Best Stories Win Truck Force Action Prizes!!       In my neck of the woods, when the Amish don't know your name, you'll probably be called "Jakey" sooner
    or later.       My time was sooner when I received a scratchy phone call from an "Amish Pay Phone Booth". (They keep phones away from where they live, often in shacks where rain fouls-up the connection and voice quality.) The voice on the other end was unmistakeable, an Amishman. "Hey", says he "you're the hearse driver for mules aren't you Jakey?" Half asleep, I thought some buddy was putting me on, so I said, "ya, sure, you got Jakey the mule hearse man." "What can I do for Abner", I enquired? (You call all Amishmen Abner if you don't know their names.)     "Well, I got this mule ain't doing me no good no more cause he's dead and I gotta get him outa the front of my place cause my Wife don't like dead things and it's startin' to sticnk some, you know." "In a flash of brilliance, I replied, "I guess it does ... don't all dead mules stink Abner?" "Yeah, Jakey, you got that right and I'm Milo, not Abner." "Abner's my cousin." Do you know him Jakey?, he asked rather suspiciously." No, I don't really know Abner well", said I, "but how do I get to your place to get the mule?" "It's gonna cost you fifty bucks and you've got to have the men to load it on my truck." "It's against my Religion to lift dead mules." "Really, Jakey, and what religion might that be?" I told him I was sorry but that it was also against my Religion to tell him the name of my Religion. "That would be too Worldly", I said. He replied, "Well Jakey, I certainly understand that, but do you think you could make it $35.00 for the mule carcass?" I shouted, "Hell no, I was going to get you for $75.00 plus mileage but I kinda felt you were the type of man that deserves a break." "Maybe not." "Oh no Jaakey", he said quickly, "I am that type of man and I deserve a break for true" "Fifty it'll be and you'll get no more argument from me."
              "To get to my place, you first pass
    Intercourse on the way toward White Horse, passing Bird-in-Hand and when you get to the big street in Blue Ball, turn left and go 2.7 miles to the white place with a red barn and a green roof on the house
    ... that's me" "Name Milo Stoltzfoos is on the box." "You can't miss it."
              Wearing my full respirator mask and
    blasting the AC, I drove my Black Beauty into
    Milo's spread just past dusk to see some 15
    Amishmen, several with Coleman Lanterns lighting-up the huge, dead mule. They told me it weighed between 1200 and 1500 lbs. dead. With a hoist hanging out of the upper barn window and hundreds of feet of 1" manila line, they manhandled the dead thing into my well protected cargo area (I'd stopped and bought a throw-away plastic drop cloth at the Hardware store to protect my sano super machine.) My Super Duty shocks and struts hardly budged when they dropped the big dead thing into the truck. Milo tried writing a check, but I reminded him about my Religion and how we only deal in cash. He looked cheated because he couldn't cheat me, which he'd loved to have done, and I
    blasted off the the renderers.            The
    Flowmasters made a
    beautiful sound on that quiet country night and Amish Farm, and just getting $50. from an Amishman is a jackpot rarely duplicated in my experience. If you need Jakey's Hearse, Just call Truck Force Dave. Next time I'll tell you about the $1,000.00 fine I helped a friend pay to his nasty ex -wife. He took 50,000 pennies and dumped them into my truck bed filled with corn syrup (on protective plastic sheeting). My job was to dump the whole load in her front yard and give her a note from him that said something like, "Here's your grand [non-permissible content removed], I hope you have fun taking it to the bank! She yelled, screamed and groaned and I told her, I'm Truck Force Dave, alias Jakey the Hearse Man, I
    can't help you ... I just deliver in style!!       If you've got a good story (and they have to be better than these), send them with pictures if possible and we'll make you a WEB-SITE STAR and send you a Truck Force Gift of great value. Well, sort of Great.

    Send your story and Pic's to [email protected]

    http://community.webtv.net/truckforce/USTF
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    Good luck on this one now!
  • trucksrmetrucksrme Member Posts: 381
    image
    Good luck on this one now!
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    ZEE CONTEST TO END ALL WEB CONTESTS
         Dave-40, Supreme Commander of the U.S. Truck Force has a challenge for everyone who visits this Web Site between now and July 4, 2000 at Midnight.
         Contest Rules are simple: 1. You must reside on Earth and be well-
    schooled enough to read these rules and follow the contest entry procedure. 2.
    You can only enter using your real name (or screen name) one time. That's once
    each, dig. 3. You must send your answer in a legible fashion timed to arrive
    from now until 12 P.M. on July 4, 2000. 4. No more than two entries can come from the same mailing address. (This will allow a Man and Wife or any two folks at the same house to each enter once. Dave-40 has full faith and trust in all
    U.S. Truck Force Members, and any person smart enough to visit this site on occassion, to play by the rules and not cheat by one person sending in two entries!) 5. Each entry has to represent the thinking of the entrant and not
    come as advice from trucking professionals looking to make a quick buck. 6. It's
    obvious that in order to receive a prize, which will be explained below, you must provide a correct mailing address along with your Zip Code. (The U.S.
    Truck Force has no interest in where you live for any reason other than to send you a prize if you should be one of the FIVE WINNERS. We never lend or sell our
    mail lists for any reason and would never take advantage of your trust in our
    Group.
         CONTEST WORKS LIKE THIS: Dave-40 has had his present GMC Sierra 6 liter
    since February of 1999. It was brand new when he took delivery. The Truck is lovingly used for work every workday. He drives not just to a from work, but also drives in his job using the exceptionally comfortable Sierra. Of course, it's well maintained at all times and has never "broken down" for any reason.
         To enter you must guess the number of miles on Dave-40's Odometer. If
    you should get very lucky and guess the exact number, you win a $100.00 Money
    Order sent to the name you entered as and to the address you provided. The prizes will be mailed within one week of the close of the contest. If you
    are the closest guesser and guess the number of miles within 100 of the actual
    odometer reading, you win a $50.00 Money Order. If you are closest and are not within 100 miles, you get a $40.00 Money Order. The next four closest guessers
    will each win $30.00 Money Orders.
         Put on your guessing hat, scratch your elbow and send in your best idea
    as to how many miles Dave-40 has put on the Sierra. It's easy and fun and could be worth a few bucks for not too much effort. By the way, from the time of posting, Dave-40's odometer will be taped over just in case there might be someone who knows of Dave's whereabouts or where he parks his truck at work or
    home. There'll be skullduggery in this U.S. Truck Force Sponsored event!
         Good luck to all my Good Truckin' Pals and Gals. Sure hope you are the
    BIG WINNER!! Good Luck to All, Dave-40.
    [email protected]
  • f220swiftf220swift Member Posts: 103
    because previously big Dave could not place together an entire sentence without copying it from a GM invoice. And know, Big Dave resembles the liking of a novelist.--Swift
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    For My Friend SWIFT
         It never ceases to amaze me that folks in and around the U.S. Truck Force family are uncommonly intuitive. Swift, you MUST be a Psychic or a Mind Reader or possess a healthy dose of ESP. How in the world did you ever guess that I am, in fact, writing a novel that's far from finished but well-along. It
    has the backdrop of the twenty first Century and the age of Transportation. Can't give away the plot line, the characters or the planned title. But, I can tell you that it has very little to do with GMC invoices and more to do with
    alimony payments and what goes on under the blankets on Southwest Airlines.
    Your direct line into my thought patterns is a bit scary... but I'll be OK.
    Hang in there and try to get over the comic books -- really, it's over. Be the Big Guy we know you are!
         Best Wishes For a Productive Summer,
         
         BIG DAVE-40
  • f220swiftf220swift Member Posts: 103
    Keep it goin--
    Swift
  • RoclesRocles Member Posts: 982
    To think I live near big Dave!!
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    Keep your distance
  • quadrunner500quadrunner500 Member Posts: 2,721
    LOL!
  • RoclesRocles Member Posts: 982
    Awww..come on Dave!! Are you going to get a restraining order on me?? LOL!
  • dave40dave40 Member Posts: 582
    Not restraining order ! Protection from abuse order !

    LOL!
  • rrichfrrichf Member Posts: 211
    dave40,
    Nice looking trucks but no Fords, Dodges or Toyotas? ;)
    Rich
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    ...actually it's whoever sends it in...so i guess Chevy is the peoples' Choice?

    - tim
  • rrichfrrichf Member Posts: 211
    Tim,
    Maybe it's only people with Chevy trucks own cameras?
    Rich
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    my answer better...

    LOL

    ..perhaps all the others just are not worth photographing??

    - Tim
  • mgdvhmanmgdvhman Member Posts: 4,157
    ..but do we really want them?

    - Tim
  • RoclesRocles Member Posts: 982
    Ahhh...All of the Ford trucks are working while the Chevy guys pose with theirs! ;)
  • quadrunner500quadrunner500 Member Posts: 2,721
    Ah...love the dart board!
This discussion has been closed.