Ugliest Cars of All Time

Mr_Shiftright

Most "nose-heavy" cars are ugly to most people. If there is too much protrusion over the front wheels, or if the grille is too high and too heavy, the car is generally not attractive. On a Rolls you have a big grille, but it does not extend 3 feet past the front wheels!

speedshift

How would you like to wake up to this every morning?

http://www.dia.org/exhibitions/carcamera/electralarger.html

andre1969

...to wake up to! I think the '59 Buicks are an example of how ugly can still "work" in the design of a car. Sure, it lacks good taste, and it's chromey, and it's gaudy. But something about it still looks youthful and kinda sporty. The '58 Buick was everything bad the '59 was and more, but just came off looking bulky and stodgy. And the '60, while it was toned down a lot, also had a stodgy look to it.

I'm probably the only person that would 'fess up to this, but I actually like the Toronado of the '70's! I liked the earlier models because they were still true hardtops, while the Eldorado had gone to an opera window. But even in the later '70's, they just had a certain coolness to them. Yes, as a matter of fact, I start therapy tomorrow ;-)

badgerpaul

I don't know, I kind of liked the '59 Buick. When compared to the '58 Buick chromemobiles, it seemed clean and the canted headlights always looked cool to me.

andre1969

...normally I don't like them, but I think Buick did a better job than Lincoln, Chrysler, or DeSoto!

Mr_Shiftright

I'll vote for "hideous" if y'all don't mind.

What a pile of mismatched plumbing. There isn't a sane line on the car. Nothing relates or attaches to anything else. It's like they built a car by running up and down the aisles at Pick-a-Part.



"Hey, let's stack the headlights...oh, I dunno...diagonally! And let's run this strip down to the...oh, I dunno, middle of the tailights."

"And let's show the whole wheel up front and only 1/4 of the wheel in back, so that the car looks like it has a piano in the trunk."

"If it sticks out, chrome it, and if it looks delicate, make it heavier"

But I agree, the '58 was even worse.

badgerpaul

Back when they were new my grandfathers business partner had one. Because of the slant on the trunk lid, there wasn't a whole lot of height in the trunk. One day he put a single cylinder engine for an air compressor in the trunk slammed the lid and the spark plug on the engine poked a hole in the deck lid.

jrosasmc

A '58 Buick.

speedshift

up until about 9:00 last night. I was going to post that link in Most Attractive Cars and then I really looked at the photo. Jeez they were ugly. Shifty's right, nothing makes sense. Usually that doesn't bother me too much but I guess this is where I draw the line. Looks like the result of an illicit union between Bill Mitchell and Virgil Exner.

andre1969

Leave my Virg alone!! ;-)

Mr_Shiftright

I'm warnin' ya, Andre, if I find him I'm gonna dig him up and interrogate him.

speedshift

Early Virg = good.

Late Virg = heavily influenced stylistically by little green men.

andre1969

I like to think of Exner like I do Elvis. There's the hip, cool Elvis and the fat, bloated, sequin-jumpsuited Elvis. To me, Exner started scarfing down those peanut butter sandwiches and sewing on sequins in '59.

Mr_Shiftright

I'd say he peaked early if that's what you mean, like after his first car. He helped to set automotive styling back 10-15 years in America. But no worse than some others in the US and in Europe, that's true. He certainly wasn't alone in losing his way.

dennisjhs

The Studebaker GT Hawk 1962-1964 was not just an old body with a T Bird type roof; that would be unfair and simplifying the facts. Yes, its true that the basic body shell dated from the 1953 Starliner body, but it also had a completely new interior design featuring bucket seats, T10 warner 4 speed, and a concave instrument cluster with a full set of Stewart Warner gauges. Brooks Stevens was hired in March of 1961 to re-design (on a budget GM would laugh at!)the Hawk and the vehicle was ready for the market in less than 9 months. The Avanti was design leader, low in drag coefficient, (I believe in a test in 1970's determined to be .36), way ahead of its time. By the way, Studebaker did have various super charged v8's, but also had a dual 4 bbl model R4 engine available. The vehicles including the Avanti broke various speed records at Bonneville...And, Studebaker was the first domestic vehicle maker to offer frnt caliper Disc Brakes either as an option or standard (Avanti) across the entire line of passenger cars way back in 1963!
But, I do agree that the Packard Hawk is kind of ugly, but so is the 1958 Buick Limited; a prime example of styling excess of the late 50's.

speedshift

Okay, here's a link. Looks a little clunky in the front but otherwise a nice updating of the '53 body. I really liked them growing up, big improvement over the finned '61. My '56 was a real tank but with the right options a '62 would have been nice.

http://www.bigboystoys.bizhosting.com/pages/vc-851s.html

Mr_Shiftright

Dennis--if the Gran Turismo Hawk uses the basic 1953 body shell some nine years later, I would say it's at least fair enough to call it an "old body with a new roof" without insulting the car, and with old engines and old chassis as well. I owned a '55 Speedster, a '56 Golden Hawk and a '63 Hawk and I felt that the Hawk was very familiar to me inside and out.

These were attractive cars (except for the '58 Packard Hawk of course) and the 289 V8 was quite sturdy, but these Hawks were pretty clumsy to drive if you weren't going in a straight line. But then, this was true of most American cars in the early 60s except for the Corvette perhaps and the Corvair (which had great brakes by the way). The supercharged Hawk models were dangerously overpowered for their brakes and suspension.

carnut4

I was just wondering-your comments on the 59 Buick [I got a laugh out of what you said] made me remember-seems like you expressed a liking for the 55 Buick Roadmaster a while back, and at least then, you were thinking about getting one-a convertible? I'd be interested to hear you compare the styling of the 55 to the styling of the 59. Any luck looking for a 55? I just learned that Jay Leno owns a 55 Roadmaster convertible, and that it was his first "classic" car purchase, back in 1974.

Mr_Shiftright

Well that's a good point, carnut. I could defend myself on two points. One, I can like things that are ugly, and two, the proportions of the '55 are a lot better and the car, while gaudy in a 50s way, is not so completely chaotic and overdone.

It's like when someone dresses up. One hat is nice, but two hats just goes over the top.

andre1969

...I think the '55-56 models are beautiful, but the '57 redesign just didn't look quite right. The car looks great from the side, but from a front shot it looks kinda "bug-eyed" (not as bad as a '57 Ford though!), a bit slab-sided, and kind of tipsy, like it's not quite wide enough. And enough has already been said about '58 that I probably couldn't add much! Hey, at least the '59 had fewer chrome squares in the grille! The '58 had 160...don't know how many the '59 had.

speedshift

The customizers had fun with '58 Buick grilles. I knew a guy who put part of one in the grille opening of his '65 Mustang. Very tasteful.

The '57 Buick was actually a fairly snappy design, just really conservative compared to Exner's designs that year. Apparently it was a very expensive restyle but made the mistake of not looking it--evolutionary rather than revolutionary. Of course with the kind of sales Buick had through '56 "if it ain't broke don't fix it". By '58 it was definitely broke.

I had a '57 Buick Special coupe for a while, really more of a pillared coupe than a two-door sedan, pretty attractive I thought. Had the 364-2v and standard close ratio stick and some pretty decent gears and it moved pretty well. They're not as attractive as the '54-6, just look a little narrow especially from the front, but I always liked that three-window backlight.

Back in the day I liked the '55 the best, probably because the Dagmars were bigger (can I say that here?) but now I think the '54 is cleaner--if it's appropriate to call any '50s Buick clean. I always thought the '56 looked a little pinched.

speedshift

Shifty will have a stroke when he sees this--not every line is deftly drawn--but it just makes me want to smile. I think they did pretty good considering they were working with an old bodyshell. At least they caught the spirit of the age.

http://www.57heaven.com/Hollywood.html

andre1969

I checked out the Buicks on that site you posted, Speedshift, and looking at them, I think there's two things that, if they were done differently, would improve the looks of the car. First, the lower bumper just juts out too much...kinda reminds me of some of those "safety" bumpers we started seeing tacked on the fronts of cars in 1974. Then there's the headlights. If they just had more of a forward thrust to them, or just some "eyebrows" over them, like on the other GM cars, it would get rid of that bug-eyed look. I'm sure Shifty could come up with a few more styling problems than I could, but I think those two would fix it for me.

I think the '57 Olds is another good example of a whole new design that just doesn't look that new. I think the Olds is probably my favorite of the '57 GM cars, but it just doesn't look that different from '55-56. I guess like you said..."If it ain't broke, don't fix it!"

speedshift

Right, the '57 Buick grille makes the car look like it needs braces. And it does have that skinned look, like it had its eyebrows blown off.

Yes, I like the Olds too, same shell but much cleaner. But just about every GM looked stodgy that year compared to the Mopars--the Pontiac has styling cues that Buick had worked to death by then. If they had only known the Forward Look was just a passing phase (no offense ;-) Harley Earl might still be head of Art & Colour. Earl tried to outdo himself in '58 and it was a bad end to a great career.

I bet after Shifty uses his rubber hose on Exner he's going looking for Earl.

Mr_Shiftright

I remember that Hudson? when I was a little kid and we all thought it was ugly even then. It was a big flop at the time. To give you an idea of looking at it through eyes of the 1950s, people thought these cars looked like old people trying to dress young or trying to be "hip" without really getting it.

speedshift

Yes, it does look like it was designed by a committee of guys wearing bow ties and eye shades.

These cars always fascinated me growing up. So did '58 Buicks, especially the Limited with the extra helping of chrome. Just to prove I have some taste, I still distinctly remember the pale blue 3.8 XK-E coupe always parked in front of my elementary school. This would have been around 1963, must have been brand new.

timz58

'70 Mazda Sedan
Dodge Durango
Any Taurus up to the last body change (the turd shaped ones are the worst)
58,59 chevy, buick and olds
Any Ford Maverick (especially the pea green ones) great cars though just about bullet proof.
Another great car but butt ugly were the early Subaru coupes.
58 and up thunderbirds until the change to the new body style.
71-75 chevy impalas
60-85 cadillacs

badgerpaul

Now that is truly one ugly car. When I was a kid in grade school there was one that was parked up the street. After a couple of days walking by it on the way to school, I mentioned to my mother that it seemed strange that the guy would still be working under the dash. The police were called and it turns out he had expired while sniffing glue under the dash. I alway thought that it might be from the shame of having to drive such an ugly car.

mrluther

Here's my two cents...ugly cars, where to begin! First, dont slag the French, Citroen cars were and are revolutionary...second, anyone who ever lived in England as long as I did can tell you that save MG and the mini, Brits are daft in their design. I have to agree with those who mentioned any AMC product( GREMLIN!!!) and the Chrysler Airflow and Henry J's were nasty. I also remember a car called the Belvedere, that was poor. I drove a Trabant in East Berlin in the mid-80's and it was like pushing a donkey. No working heater as well. I also feel that the BMW Z-3 softtop is an affront to decency. To backslide a little, the French companies Simca and Renault built some real lemons but Citroen is excused! One last comment..the Gran Turino...yuk!! Take care all!!

speedshift

I don't know, boys, what do you think?

http://www.kfnut.com/1951models/page2.html

I understand these were quite fast when equipped with the optional Cadillac 331 ;-).

speedshift

Cadillac should have used this in their Super Bowl ad.

http://www.carcruises.freeserve.co.uk/ClassicCapriPhotos/UN5b.jpg

Mr_Shiftright

Henry Js are popular but not as collectible cars. As collectibles they are nearly worthless but they are often used to make street rods, because they are small and light and weird.

As for that purple whatever, too much beer and a welding torch is a dangerous thing. Looks like a '58 Chevy

merckx

I kinda like it;nice stripes on roof. I had it pegged as Ford Galaxie Starliner,circa'61.

speedshift

Same company, different side of the pond.

andre1969

...I thought it was a '61 Plymouth with some horrible mix of '58 Chevy, '60 Ford, and early '60's Mercury taillights!

bhill2

No mixture with any other car could make a '61 Plymouth MORE horrible.

ghulet

....kinda reminds me of a Marlin. Now there's a radically ugly car if ever I saw one. Giganto boxy Rambler down below meets curvy sports coupe up top. Ugly mutt.

merckx

English Ford Capri!(I gotta quit sneaking quick looks here at work!)

speedshift

This is the best picture I could find of this car. I guess there aren't any photos on the web because it keeps breaking cameras. This illustration just doesn't fully convey how hideous these cars are, especially from the rear. Maybe another bizarre reaction to the Forward Look? In just a few years they would be fairly handsome cars. And for two years you could get one with the Cobra 289, while you couldn't get more than the 289-2v in the Ford version of this car.

http://www.falconman.com/cometclub.html

seeburg222

Have you ever seen the 'assimetrical' styling prototypes that Exner did of the '61 Plymouths? The cars have no centerline, the hood ridge is off center to the left etc. EGAD!!!

Mr_Shiftright

See, I told you the man was mad.

andre1969

...was that Exner had gone mad, but just that Chrysler's quality control was so bad the cars ended up assymetrical my mistake!

Hey, since we were bashing the '59 Buick awhile back, I thought I'd post this...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=1803881230

It's a '59 Buick that's for sale on Ebay. Lots and lots of pics to get up close and personal with this beast, and get a feel for what it was really like!

Mr_Shiftright

Actually I have to confess a fondness for 50s dashboards.

$4,050 bid? He'd be a fool to turn it down, but there's time left he may get a bit more. Too bad it wasn't a convertible or 2dr in that kind of shape. He could have doubled his money.

dustyk

.........has always been number one on my top ten list of ugly cars. When much younger I didn't like anything from Chrysler as far as styling. The 1962 Dodge police cars were another ugly breed. Now, however, the '57 Chevy seems so stale and the "Forward Look" appeals to me. I love the Dodges and DeSotos from '57 through '60.

Number two on my list is more current, the last of the Chevy Caprices. Early Tauruses are number three.

My brother had a Saab something-or-other that had a two-cycle motor and sounded like a motor scooter. The rear wheel width was about half of the front as I remember it. That car was ugly, too.

I never liked the '49 Studebaker Champion, either, but that could've been the fault of my sister's first husband. That's what he drove. I saw one last summer and I wanted it.

'39-'41 Lincolns could always make me lose my lunch as well.

Dusty

opera_house_wk

I had a 75 Mazda RX2 rotary and I remember what Car and Driver said about it when they compared it to others in the same class. "It was the car they most liked to drive and least liked to be seen in."

sundaydriver3

The A310 2 door hatch
The B210 4door notchback.
Even worse, Datusn turned inot Nissan, and they thopught their Sentra was such a hit, a BMW killer. With few exceptions, Datsun / Nisaans are the worst looking cars ever, and their base 4cyl cars no fun to drive.

badtoy

Car and Driver once called one of Datsun's styling efforts "a piece of plastic that's gone all soft and warpy in the sun." (They also called the Citroen an "angry clam".)

On the other hand, the 510 was and is a wonderfully proportioned, crisp and nicely detailed sedan that commands a level of infatuation exceeded only by the Mini Cooper, the SE-R of the 90s really WAS a cheap alternative to the 318 (and much better built, by the way), and the current Sentras are wonderfully flexible, smooth and powerful -- especially the SPEC-V, which was designated as one of Sport Compact Car's 8 Great Rides this month. In fact, the SPEC-V makes a Celica GT-S feel like a sewing machine.

speedshift

Speaking of fins on sportscars...

http://www.vandenplas.com/daimler/images/portme.jpg

jrosasmc

1964-70 Chevy Van (forward control)

Mr_Shiftright

The Japanese have gone from weird to harmless in their styling, with an occasional home run. They don't make really ugly cars anymore, though, except for the Tokyo Motor Show.